


truth or dare

by riveatstoes



Category: South Park
Genre: M/M, Sleepover Fic, The Office References, Truth or Dare, Weebs
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-26
Updated: 2020-06-26
Packaged: 2021-03-03 21:08:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,957
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24922051
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/riveatstoes/pseuds/riveatstoes
Summary: Craig and Those Guys are having a sleepover. Things are going pretty well, but when they break out the ol’ game of Truth or Dare, things get a little...odd.
Relationships: Craig Tucker/Tweek Tweak
Comments: 1
Kudos: 96





	truth or dare

**Author's Note:**

> this is kinda bad but eh...enjoy.

Maybe truth or dare was a mistake. Maybe he should’ve gone home. Maybe he shouldn’t have allowed Clyde to follow his stupid delusion that he could get him to do something stupid. Yeah, Craig could’ve stopped it, he could’ve left, but he wouldn’t dare leave Tweek to fight off the fiends that were their “friends” alone.

Sure, he knew Tweek was more than capable of handling the gremlins that their friends were, but it was just common courtesy. Besides, he’s already used all three of this year’s “get-out-of-a-sleepover-free” cards.

“Alright, who’s g-g-going first, Fellas?” Jimmy asked as the guys sat down in a circle on the floor of Token’s room. For the most part, they just shrugged in response, but Clyde was more than happy to volunteer.

He looked around, but eventually settled on Tweek, “Truth or dare?”

“Uh...truth?”

“How much coffee have you had today?”

Tweek hesitated, but eventually lifted up his hand and began counting on his fingers. After a moment of silence, he answered with the strangest amount of confidence, “Eight cups? I think?”

Clyde shook his head disapprovingly, “C’mon, I thought you were past this, man...your mother and I are worried about you...” he put his arm around Token.

“I’m not his mom.”

“Yes you are. We agreed on this when we played House last month. I’m the daddy, you’re the mommy, Tweek and Jimmy are our sons, and Craig is the kid next door that Tweek has the hots for.”

“Why can’t we both be the dad?”

“Because then Cynthia from two houses down would stare at us at the cookouts, Token!” He replied, as if it was the most obvious thing, “We’re already on thin-fucking-ice for letting our dog Bandit off his leash at the park!”

Token just looked confused, “Since when do we have a dog?”

“Since Christmas, asshole! I swear, I’m the only one who remembers this shit! It’s so stressful. God. I bet you don’t remember our eight cats either, do you, Token? You don’t remember Dasher and Dancer and Prancer and Vixen, Comet and Cupid and Donner and Blitzen, do you?” He crossed his arms.

“Nope.”

Craig looked up from his phone, taking his attention off of Tumblr for .5 seconds, “We’re fourteen, why the hell do we still play House anyways?”

“Because it gives us the sense of an unbroken and normal, middle-class family that admittedly none of us have. That society has not granted us.”

“...Fuck.”

Tweek tugged at the collar of his shirt, “Can we move on now?”

“Sure. You’re next.”

“Uhm...Jimmy?”

“Y-Yeah?”

“Truth or dare?”

“Dare.”

He thought for a second, “I dare you to act out a scene from your favorite Disney movie.” Tweek knew Jimmy’s favorite Disney movie was Tangled, so naturally he acted out the “Smolder” scene. All by himself.

It was actually pretty interesting.

Jimmy ended up choosing Craig to ask the cursed question of truth or dare, to which he responded ‘dare.’ Jimmy was absolutely ruthless when it came to dares, so he chose something he knew he would hate: “Act like you absolutely d-d-d-despise Tweek for the rest of the game.”

“What?!”

“Dude what the hell?”

You should be able to tell who gave what reaction.

“I-It’s a dare. You h-ha-have to!”

“I’m not doing that. It’s mean.”

Clyde wiped away a nonexistent tear from his cheek, “Unfortunately, it is the rules. You have to go through with the dare. I’m so...so sorry.”

Craig groaned and looked down at his hand, which was placed comfortably on top of Tweek’s. Cursing Jimmy’s existence as he did so, he yanked his hand away and put it around his phone like the other one was.

Jimmy smirked, “Y-Your turn, gayboy.”

“Fuck off,” he muttered, looking over at Token, “Truth or dare?”

“Dare.”

“I dare you to go out into the streets in your underwear, run around and shout that the British are coming while we flicker your room lights on and off.”

“What. The. Hell, Craig.”

Tweek began to laugh, but Craig looked over at him and asked what he was laughing about in the most serious, slightly scary voice he could manage. That shut him up quickly.

Muttering to himself the entire time, Token walked down the stairs, stripped down once he was at the door, went outside, and fulfilled the dare. The entire time, the boys just laughed - mostly snorted, actually - at him and flickered the lights on and off. Clyde recorded the entire thing.

He went back inside when he heard his mother yelling at him.

Once they were sat back down, they all agreed that they were hungry and wanted snacks. Knowing exactly what he was doing, Jimmy suggested that Tweek and Craig go get them.

Tweek protested, not wanting to be put through what he knew would happen, but eventually he was convinced and the two went down to the kitchen.

“What should we get?”

“I don’t fucking know. They’ll probably eat anything so just choose something at random.” To be honest, Craig thought he was doing great. He didn’t want to be caught breaking the rules because he knew that the others would never let it go. He assumed that Tweek would understand.

That assumption stopped the second he heard sniffling.

“Hey, are you okay?”

Tweek looked at him and sat down the bag of chips he had been holding, “Yeah I’m...I’m great.”

“No you’re not. You can tell me what’s wrong, Honey.”

“You know what’s wrong. You were dared to act like an asshole. I know you don’t mean to upset me, but I came here to spend time with you. We’re leaving tomorrow morning, and we’re probably going to bed after the game is over...so I won’t get what I wanted.”

The realization hit him in the face like the rock Kenny had thrown at him during a game of Extreme Tag, “Oh shit. I’m so sorry, I didn’t realize that, uh...this meant so much to you.”

“Of course it does! We hardly get to spend time together anymore and it’s not fair! And now that we finally do, Jimmy gives you a dare that compromises that,” he paused suddenly, but continued seconds later, “I’m sorry...this is stupid. Let’s just go back.”

He picked the bag back up and walked to the fridge to grab a few cold drinks. Once he had all that, he started back up the stairs. Craig followed him, sighing. He would have to do something about this entire situation.

The second everyone was settled with their snacks, Clyde suggested that they go back to playing. It was kind of normal at first, but once Jimmy got the chance to dare Tweek it went downhill.

“As r-r-revenge for your previous dare, I dare you to ac-act out a scene from a TV show...with Craig.”

Tweek’s eyes narrowed, “You’re really just trying to be an asshole, aren’t you?” But regardless, he turned towards Craig and tried to think of a scene. They both seemed to think of the same thing at the same time, and held up their phones to their ears.

“Hello, this is Dwight Schrute from the Dunder Mifflin paper company,” Hearing that come from Craig was so weird, considering it was pure monotone in place of the usually eccentric and over-the-top voice of Mr. Schrute.

Tweek smiled, but repressed it for the sake of the scene, “Well, that’s great, ‘cause I need paper.”

“Excellent, then you are in luck, because we are having a limited-time offer only on everything.”

“Wow, this is my lucky day!”

Knowing exactly what this was, Clyde joined in as the Michael of the situation, “Ask him his name,” He said calmly, as if what he did wouldn’t trigger something truly cursed.

“What is your name, sir?”

It gradually became harder to maintain a straight face, but Tweek prevailed because the scene would be worth it, “I am Bill Buttlicker.”

“Really? That’s your real name?”

He faked offense, “How dare you? My family built this country, by the way.”

Craig refused to make eye contact with anyone, because he knew the second he did, everything would crumble. He maintained this the entire time ‘Michael’ was scolding him for being disrespectful to ‘Mr. Buttlicker.’

Tweek then went on the entire talking spree Jim did in the scene that I’m too lazy to throw in but you get the gist. They’re acting out a scene from The Office haha funny amiright.

Then came the line of “BUTTLICKER! OUR PRICES HAVE NEVER BEEN LOWER!” and they all died laughing. That’s it. That’s the fic.

Just kidding. They went on with truth or dare, Jimmy lifting the “Craig Has To Be An Asshole” rule because it was considered by The Council - which is just Clyde with a fancier name - to be cruel and unusual punishment, which is against one of the amendments maybe.

Then came time for Clyde to dare Craig, which could never end well. Maybe he agreed to dare because he was in a good mood, because he was simply vibing having Tweek laying on him while he played with his hair - but it’s not gay though. 

“I dare you...to say ‘rawr XD’ in your best anime girl voice.”

He looked up at Clyde as if he had suggested they inject gamer girl bath water into their bloodstream.

“What.”

“You heard me.” Clyde couldn’t contain the shit-eating grin that was spreading across his face. He knew tactics with which he could back Craig into a corner. He was leaving this sleepover with video footage of Craig Tucker saying ‘rawr XD’ if it was the last thing he did.

“I’m not doing it. That sounds stupid.”

“Fine, then I’ll go Jimmy’s route and dare you to stay six feet away from Tweek for the rest of the night.”

Craig shook his head, “You can’t hold him as leverage over me.”

“Yes I can, and I will. Say it, coward.”

“Yeah,” Tweek smirked, “say it.”

At this point Token was passed out, and Clyde would be damned if Craig would take that as a way to get out of it, “Hurry up and decide.”

“...I guess I’ll say it. But I’m not doing the voice. I’m not gonna sound fucking stupid while saying words that are fucking stupid.”

“That works,” Clyde responded, pulling out his phone and pressing ‘record’ on the camera app.

Craig sighed, looked directly at the camera and Clyde, and mumbled, “...Rawr XD,” then immediately flipped it off and fell back onto the floor.

That was more than enough for Mr. Donovan, and he instantly started playing the video over-and-over again, ecstatic to be able to hear his best friend say something so stupid.

After literal hours of watching the video and sending it to everyone he knew, Clyde came to realize that everyone except him had fallen asleep. Sighing with adoration of his adoptive-bro-family, he went and grabbed blankets from the closet across the hall.

“Sweet dreams, T,” he said lovingly as he placed a dark purple blanket over Token, the first to go in the battle.

He draped a yellow one over Jimmy and said the same, but with a ‘J’ instead of a ‘T.’ Duh.

And then he dumped two different blankets onto Tweek and Craig without even bothering to spread them out so that they fully covered them, “Goodnight, Gaywads,” he whispered, knowing full well that by the time morning came, they would be fully covered somehow. Gay magic, probably.

Then, he plopped onto Token’s king-sized bed and covered himself with the fifteen-million layers that were at his disposal. That was the perk of being the last to fall asleep - you get the best bed. Token wouldn’t mind.

Probably.


End file.
